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When you forget how to coach<\/a> (and it happens to ALL of us), it\u2019s natural to pick up the tool you\u2019re most familiar with. We fall back on old habits – ways of relating and being. So for the brand-new coach, that might mean slipping into fix-it mode and listening like a friend or a teacher or a boss might listen.<\/p>\n For a more advanced coach, it may be reverting to skills that were important as part of the learning process of becoming a coach, but losing some of the more advanced, more nuanced skills you\u2019ve developed along the way.<\/p>\n Think of the pixels or dots that form a digital image. When you step back and see the big picture, you can\u2019t see the dots; when you get closer, it\u2019s harder to see the picture. When you develop as a coach, you get down to the nitty-gritty and once you\u2019re there you wonder, \u201cHow did I ever coach from back there?\u201d<\/p>\n The growth edge is about \u201csharpening the saw\u201d – keeping your skills sharp as a coach, and identifying what needs sharpening, or what\u2019s the new edge, the next tool to pick up, or the tool to put down, for your coaching toolbox.<\/p>\n With any new tool or skill, you\u2019re aiming to reach the point of unconscious competence<\/a>, where you don\u2019t have to think about applying your knowledge; it\u2019s become part of you. In order to do that, you need to regularly pick up those new tools and use them frequently, even if they feel awkward or like they don\u2019t quite fit in your hands.<\/p>\n Getting to that place of unconscious competence requires regular, informed feedback from someone who is already skilled at using the tools you\u2019re trying to learn. Every great athlete or professional musician seeks out this type of feedback, and coaches need that as well. It helps you to see what you\u2019re not noticing – your \u201cblind spots<\/a>.\u201d<\/p>\n Opening yourself up to feedback and failure is scary. You may feel like you\u2019re in a perpetual state of being unqualified or not good enough, but that\u2019s exactly how you get better. It\u2019s a necessary and natural part of professional development.<\/p>\n When a new coach in one of our training programs thought they had failed because they kept trying to fix and tell, the feedback from the other students was how much they learned from that – far more than from the other coaching demonstrations where the person did great. And after some time had passed, that student could recognize their own learning as well and appreciate the experience.<\/p>\n You\u2019ve got to fail, and fail BIG sometimes. Failure means you\u2019ve been brave and bold. And that\u2019s what our clients ultimately want from us, is to risk and be bold. Failure\u2019s gotten a bad name, and maybe we need a different name for it, like \u201cboldly going where no one has gone before,\u201d or \u201cexploring your growth edge.\u201d<\/p>\n